Thursday, March 19, 2009

Baby Blood

Some movies are very hard to categorize. I the case of the 1989 French film Baby Blood, it is because we have no category such as “alien creature lives in woman’s vagina and commands her to kill.” Stupid us.

Yanka (the voluptuous Emmanuelle Escourrou) works at a circus, alongside her jealous and abusive husband. One day, the circus gets a new leopard, which all the other animals seem afraid of. I sense foreshadowing! Sure enough, that night the leopard explodes, as leopards are wont to do. Apparently, there was a snake-like parasite living in the leopard, and now it is on the loose. In the middle of the turmoil, it finds a sleeping Yanka, who unfortunately for her, does not sleep with her legs crossed. The parasite crawls into her, er, um, nether regions, and the suddenly pregnant Yanka runs away from the circus, which is at least a change of pace.

Living in the city, the frequently nude Yanka finds the parasite can talk to her, and a struggle ensues between the creature and Yanka over who is running the show. The little bundle of joy needs Yanka to kill people and find it blood so it can grow. This indicates that all those who say pregnancy is a beautiful thing are lying. Yanka more or less goes along with this out of maternal instinct, and a number of victims gorily meet their end. (interestingly enough, at least to me, at no point during the long mental conversations Yanka has with her passenger does she ask it if she’s going to explode like the leopard. That’s information I’d want to have.)

Eventually, it’s spawnin’ time, and Yanka is compelled toward the sea, where junior will live once he’s on his own. What are his plans for the future, Mom asks. To evolve, says the little nipper. Why, asks Mom. To replace man, says the growth. Oh, bummer, when is that going to happen? About 5,000 years. Well, screw it, then.

Overall, I would say the movie isn’t a complete waste. The conversations with fetus part gets a little old, but you can’t fault the film for lack of originality, and Escourrou is easy on the eyes. Supposedly, they are finally getting around to making a sequel, this time written by Escourrou as well as starring her. I guess junior will come back.

If you are a fan of gore, abundant female nudity, and exploding leopards, this is the movie for you.


John Hornor Jacobs said...

Hmm. I need to teach you how to take screen caps of dvds to add to your blog. Especially on these naughty ones.

KentAllard said...

That sounds close to work. I'll see about that when I get a chance. Why you'd want to see a picture of a blowed-up leopard is beyond me, though.